Valley Boys Podcast

Dave talks about a 'dick detector' his childhood friend found, pornbot names, red/green flags, the latest crazy headlines, and pretending to be Danny Glover on Yahoo Answers.
 
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Dave talks about the lack of a War on Christmas this year, Starbucks drinks testing his waistline, pro athlete salaries being justified, and some truly crazy headlines from the last week
 
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Dave talks about Twin Flames and the dumpster fire types of people to get involved in that, Blackberrys, recent crazy headlines,  and how religions with sex rules are sex cults. 

Dave declares he's already over Christmas, talks about the ineffectiveness of voicemail, horror movie nudity, Boxing Day vs. Black Friday, the gong show of his first job, and the Rife rage

Dave discusses Black Friday, how a French Bulldog ruined Thanksgiving and not him, the creepy older guy in small towns that hang around teenagers, and people pooping in line at Disneyland (yes really)

Dave talks about karate dorks, the Punk in the Park Festival, etiquette for falling down, unfortunate nicknames, and if cereal box prizes came with trashy liquor

Dave speculates on the superior being; the Sega Kid or the Super Nintendo Kid. Also talks about Bill Burr's movie Old Dads, 23andMe letdowns for white people, and first-time unsupervised internet access.
 
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Dave describes his recent disastrous trip to San Diego, naked people urinating on subway trains, and a police officer who was recognized by one of her OnlyFans subscribers during a traffic stop
 
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Dave talks about OJ Simpson avoiding LA (and reflective surfaces) as to not meet 'who did it', GoPuff delivering 'adult toys', and getting caught vandalizing his own desk with disparaging remarks about his teacher
 
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Dave speculates the scene if Taylor Swift did the 'Tomahawk' at the Kansas City Chiefs game, if sports teams had 'insensitive' team names about western culture, when drinking in the morning is socially acceptable, and pre-planned excuses for dates.
 
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Dave talks about Lauren Boebert's husband whipping it out at a bowling alley and picking up where she left off with her new date, giving a tour of LA, and getting kicked out of Canadian Idol
 
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Dave recounts his drunk friend at an NFL game, the mommy blogger arrested for not being such a good mommy, the aliens presented in Mexico, religious polygamy, and legalized prostitution. 
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Dave describes the hellscape of driving in San Francisco, his new cat having stinky butt drama, growing older, and stages of alcoholism 
 
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Dave goes back to Disneyland and encounters more Disney Adults ruining it for the kids, gas station daycares, drunk grandmothers, and rural America
 
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Dave recalls getting to swear in front of a teacher, a man identifying as Christian yelling about food stamps, warns about guys who own swords, vocal fry, and lightly brushes on the Trump arrest
 
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Dave talks about what a Racist Conversion Camp would be like, original Nintendo cheat codes, and how a kid publicly freaked out thinking Dave was a leprechaun during a horrible time in life he wore a fedora with a chin strap beard.
 
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Dave gives advice on what NOT to do when cancelling plans, escaping a SiriusXM trial, which TV dads would vote for Trump or Biden, how every kid has a traumatizing hamster story, stealing furniture from venues that owe you money, and the Nickelback documentary.
 
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In what is technically the 100th episode, Dave goes through some of the wildest FLORIDA MAN news stories. Meth, nudity, alligators, and a whole lot of booze. 
 
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Dave describes a recent encounter of people doing their nasty business in broad day light public, DoorDash creeps, and how to handle your women stinking up the bathroom

Dave talks about why he doesn't go to parties at famous people's houses, a disastrous story where he was invited to try out for a school hockey team because they confused him with an NHL prospect, and voting against your own interests to stick it to the libs. 
 
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Dave gets into an Uber driver randomly spurring her right wing beliefs like it's a game of bingo, road trips in the 90s, how we've all been the accidental creep, and why you shouldn't drunk dial past age 30

Dave talks about the Disney Adult's cousin the Vegas Voyager, religions had logos someone had to design, judging someone based on their name, and the glory days of flip phones and MySpace
 
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Dave plots a sickening way to get revenge on a rental increase, his hatred for Trader Joe's, and makes a list of the type of guys who "whip out their hog" at inappropriate times
 
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Dave talks about how his friend got engaged to a woman he met while doing cocaine together, how the Kardashians can fart in a jar and you'd still buy it, feral barn cats, and Dry May

Dave is back talking about recent live performance blunders, banning drag shows, Easter Jesus, and how anyone saying they're 5'10 is lying

Dave goes into great detail about Disneyland's villain for children; Disney Adults. Also discussed is a school superintendent leaving his gun on the toilet for children to find, influencers, an Ai writing Dave Weasel jokes, and Madonna the Lizard Queen
 
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Dave is back to discuss when it's appropriate to start farting around your partner, fast food CEOs, and how beards make double chins look like 1.5 chins
 
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Dave Weasel expresses how he can't believe he can't go to Vegas and to an NFL game there without catching the Roni. Despite the disease, he talks about the 11.5 hour drive back to LA, Mrs. Coconuts, all while sounding like he's underwater (that's just his voice, not a technical difficulty)

Dave goes over the weird things he would do if he were Elon rich, gifts to give people you hate, and how men don’t get smarter, they learn to control their stupidity.
 
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Dave talks about the benefits of arranged marriages, swearing in kindergarten,  and dishes horror stories about a crazy Winnipeg family
 
Sponsor:
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